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Theme Seasons and Celebrations - posted on 1st Oct 2017 at 1:52 PM
Replies: 10 (Who?), Viewed: 3777 times.
Test Subject
Original Poster
#1 Old 31st Mar 2017 at 4:10 AM Last edited by Thatdepressedgirl189 : 31st Mar 2017 at 4:13 AM. Reason: Needed to add one more thing
Default Is my ex best friend up to something?
I have this one girl who goes to my co-op, she's my ex best friend. But, recently I found out she's been spreading gossip about this one girl who is my crush's (my crush is 17, the little sister is 12) little sister, and lying to me and trying to get me upset on purpose, basically found out she's a sociopathic liar, and she loves to use my anxiety as a toy for her to play with to get me upset. Well, she's acting extremely suspicous because YES she did talk shit about a lot of people, and try to look at the bad in people and it made me miserable, she talked bad about this one girl named "Micah" and told me she must've been involved with spreading rumors, along with my crush and his little sister (let's just call her Iris), and she skipped a week of co-op before returning again, but this time kinda stealing my friends from me, I hope I'm not just overreacting and everything, but I noticed how during lunchtime, my ex best friend was trying to sit with Micah and Aubree (Micah's little sister), okay Aubree made sense, but Micah? I thought she was bad talking this girl saying she was involved with rumors and stuff, now they're hanging out? it's also weird how Micah barely talks to me but talks to my ex best friend so much during lunch, and then I set my lunchbox and backpack down at one of the lunch tables, by a shy girl I knew and she was at this table by herself, by the time I came back to sit back down I had noticed this girl was sitting down by my ex best friend and the other two girls. Meaning, now I WAS by myself, I kinda started getting really questionable about this whole thing....so my mom came and she suggested I sit by my crush and his little sister and her friends, so I did. I wanted to hangout with those people all along anyway! So I sat down and it was actually pretty fun talking to them, they were nice chill people, I hungout with them after finishing lunch and we all played sharks and minnows, which was also fun, I noticed my crush came back to stand around, then join in on the football. I noticed my ex best friend saw me hanging with the "popular girls" she claimed they were, and she kinda looked over at me a few times then continued talking to Micah. She just seems up to something because she's hanging around a girl she's been talking shit about, and I'm afraid she will tell my crush Isaiah something bad, or go around him and try to act innocent when she knows SHE'S NOT. I'm making sure she doesn't get anywhere near him at all. trust me if you knew how she is, you'd be this way too.
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Top Secret Researcher
#2 Old 31st Mar 2017 at 11:13 AM
How old are you?

I wouldn't put a lot of effort into getting it transported.
Test Subject
Original Poster
#3 Old 1st Apr 2017 at 2:21 AM
Default Don't judge.
Quote:
Originally Posted by simbalena
How old are you?
Don't judge me. I'm 13.
Mad Poster
#4 Old 1st Apr 2017 at 3:25 PM
First of all, ditch the 17 year old crush. Right now he's a bit too old for you, and the relationship (depending on where you live) would probably be illegal anyway. It's probably best to find someone closer to your own age, at least until you're 16 or 18, or whatever age is considered legal where you live. In some countries, the older person can get into a lot of trouble if they have a physical relationship with an underage person, even if both of them conscent. If he'd be willing to wait for 3-5 years, he's a keeper, but at that age a lot of tenagers do get tired of waiting.

If he's just a crush, and you're not currently in a relationship together, he's free to do what he wants. He's not "yours".

Second, have a serious talk with the girl spreading rumors. If she used to be your best friend, she might still be willing to talk to you.She's probably doing it because she's angry at you for something or wants to hurt you, and sometimes confronting the person can help. Letting her say bad things about you to others will only hurt you. There's also the possibility of using an adult person you both trust as a mediator.
Test Subject
Original Poster
#5 Old 1st Apr 2017 at 4:27 PM
Default I'm not gonna stop crushing on this person..
Quote:
Originally Posted by simmer22
First of all, ditch the 17 year old crush. Right now he's a bit too old for you, and the relationship (depending on where you live) would probably be illegal anyway. It's probably best to find someone closer to your own age, at least until you're 16 or 18, or whatever age is considered legal where you live. In some countries, the older person can get into a lot of trouble if they have a physical relationship with an underage person, even if both of them conscent. If he'd be willing to wait for 3-5 years, he's a keeper, but at that age a lot of tenagers do get tired of waiting.

If he's just a crush, and you're not currently in a relationship together, he's free to do what he wants. He's not "yours".

Second, have a serious talk with the girl spreading rumors. If she used to be your best friend, she might still be willing to talk to you.She's probably doing it because she's angry at you for something or wants to hurt you, and sometimes confronting the person can help. Letting her say bad things about you to others will only hurt you. There's also the possibility of using an adult person you both trust as a mediator.
Okay, the crush isn't going to stop because of age thing. if you know what a crush is, it's kinda not in the other person's hands and it's not even a relationship so there isn't anything to worry about, but that's not even the point here. the point, is that my friend is trying to do things to get me started, and yes every fucking day I come to co-op I WISH I WASN'T A 13 YEAR OLD. I like the older boys because the ones my age are so immature and I strongly dislike them....but my hormones act up so I gotta like someone, but I can't help a crush here, and I'm not gonna let the age thing effect me, I know I have to wait a bit before I can make a move on him, I mean sheesh he already knows I like him....but my ex friend used that against me somehow, and ha, you've gotta learn to understand girls my age, for some reason there is a strong sense telling me to not let my friend around Isaiah. know why? because she's a sneaky bitch...I don't want to be one of those girls who has no friends because of that one ex friend, so that's why. Girls like me will have a crush and be mentally taken, but not psychically.
Test Subject
Original Poster
#6 Old 1st Apr 2017 at 4:34 PM
That's another reason, I hate living in this world. Is because I'm frequently judged for liking the older guys, when it's not really my fault.
Mad Poster
#7 Old 1st Apr 2017 at 7:04 PM Last edited by simmer22 : 1st Apr 2017 at 7:23 PM.
(It's possible I misread a few things, because I occasionally struggle reading large blocks of text not split into shorter paragraphs.)

I've been your age a long time ago, and I've had my share of crushes (long-distance crushes on far older boys I knew I'd never have a chance with anyway, boys who were no longer single when I met them, or boys at school). It's okay to like older guys. It's completely natural, since girls tend to mature faster than boys in their teenage years. Having a crush on an older guy is fine - but some (and of course not all) guys can exploit this if they realize you like them, and then you're over in a not so healthy crush. Just keep away from any potentially illegal activity, and don't do anything you're uncomfortable with, and you'll be fine. Also don't let anyone (the boy or a friend or anyone else) pressure you into doing something you're uncomfortable with.

You'll quickly grow out of being 13, and once you're done with the worst part of the teenage years you'll see things more clearly. Teenagers are hormone bombs, which does funny things to your brain, body and feelings. Even if you don't believe it, most of the problems you're facing now are of the kind that will eventually be solved on their own, either because the girl will grow tired of bugging you, or your school or living situation changes, or from other reasons. However, if things are getting too uncomfortable right now, you need to square up with this girl. Sounds like she's your biggest problem at the moment.

It's hard to know what will work, but you do have options. The first thing you should try is to talk to her directly, and ask her what she's up to. If there's a risk the confrontation will blow up to something worse, you can make sure to have a neutral part included in the converation (mutual friend, teacher, parent...). If the above doesn't work, you can try to be prepared by talking to people around you saying this girl might be spreading untrue rumours - that way people might be less likely to believe the girl than if you tell them afterward, since people your age have a tendency to believe the first rumour they hear. You can also choose to ignore the girl, but this option may or may not work depending on how pissed off she is. You can do a few not-so-nice options I won't list because they'll most likely make the situation worse for you. Either way, you probably should do something.
Test Subject
Original Poster
#8 Old 2nd Apr 2017 at 4:09 AM
Default Planning on telling a few people
Quote:
Originally Posted by simmer22
(It's possible I misread a few things, because I occasionally struggle reading large blocks of text not split into shorter paragraphs.)

I've been your age a long time ago, and I've had my share of crushes (long-distance crushes on far older boys I knew I'd never have a chance with anyway, boys who were no longer single when I met them, or boys at school). It's okay to like older guys. It's completely natural, since girls tend to mature faster than boys in their teenage years. Having a crush on an older guy is fine - but some (and of course not all) guys can exploit this if they realize you like them, and then you're over in a not so healthy crush. Just keep away from any potentially illegal activity, and don't do anything you're uncomfortable with, and you'll be fine. Also don't let anyone (the boy or a friend or anyone else) pressure you into doing something you're uncomfortable with.

You'll quickly grow out of being 13, and once you're done with the worst part of the teenage years you'll see things more clearly. Teenagers are hormone bombs, which does funny things to your brain, body and feelings. Even if you don't believe it, most of the problems you're facing now are of the kind that will eventually be solved on their own, either because the girl will grow tired of bugging you, or your school or living situation changes, or from other reasons. However, if things are getting too uncomfortable right now, you need to square up with this girl. Sounds like she's your biggest problem at the moment.

It's hard to know what will work, but you do have options. The first thing you should try is to talk to her directly, and ask her what she's up to. If there's a risk the confrontation will blow up to something worse, you can make sure to have a neutral part included in the converation (mutual friend, teacher, parent...). If the above doesn't work, you can try to be prepared by talking to people around you saying this girl might be spreading untrue rumours - that way people might be less likely to believe the girl than if you tell them afterward, since people your age have a tendency to believe the first rumour they hear. You can also choose to ignore the girl, but this option may or may not work depending on how pissed off she is. You can do a few not-so-nice options I won't list because they'll most likely make the situation worse for you. Either way, you probably should do something.
What you said it true. My hormones are intensely fucked up, but I tend to be prone to more panic attacks then others my age, I've had panic attacks in front of people in 5th period, which is drama class with Isaiah and most every person my age I know at co-op. I'm making a new best friend and her name is Abbigail, she's 13 like me and I'm planning on telling her about Jade, and why we're not getting along so well, and you're right about people my age believing the first thing they hear, which is why I'm thinking I need to get down to business soon, she is too active for me to ignore it because if I did ignore it the whole situation would become way worse, I've told my mom, and her mom knows about it but gave up on forcing Jade (ex friend) to apologize, for some weird reason. I don't know what it means, that she's hanging out with a girl she claimed was involved in spreading rumors about me when we were friends, I also thought that maybe I should tell Isaiah about it before Jade does something she'll regret to turn Isaiah against me, Isaiah does know I have a crush on him and he told me I have to wait till we're both older, and he's a really good guy too so he's not anywhere near the type of guy who pressures girls, he listens to his parents, he's Christian, etc. that's the good part. Jade recently found out I've been hanging out with the "popular girls" who are 6th and 7th grade girls, so they're really young but still somehow the co-op's most popular girls, they seem to be really nice, but Jade has their iMessage and could do anything anytime, at any moment which scares me, I also made the mistake of giving her Isaiah's phone number, so if she wanted to be an evil brat then she could easily send him the embarrassing love pictures she made out of us, and tell him what I daydreamed of doing with him at times, but now that she knows I hangout with the "popular girls" she doesn't seem to like it; she never said anything to me about it or anyone else about it (as far as I can tell) but when she saw me with them she kinda looked at us, then looked away.
Test Subject
Original Poster
#9 Old 2nd Apr 2017 at 4:12 AM
Also, the popular girls. They're intimidating, (They themselves don't scare me) but it would be good for me to stay on their good side, because one of the popular girls is Isaiah's little sister.
Mad Poster
#10 Old 6th Apr 2017 at 12:39 AM
Quote:
I found out she's been spreading gossip about this one girl who is my crush's (my crush is 17, the little sister is 12) little sister, and lying to me and trying to get me upset on purpose, basically found out she's a sociopathic liar, and she loves to use my anxiety as a toy for her to play with to get me upset.
This is not a friend. This is someone who is trying to harm you and others. She is a toxic mess. I feel you could do better since you clearly know the difference between right and wrong when it comes to how to treat people. You deserve people in your life who respect you.

Addicted to The Sims since 2000.
Test Subject
#11 Old 10th Apr 2017 at 12:42 PM
I do not care how old you are or how old a crush is as long as it stays a crush. you could do him a lot of harm otherwise and that my dear in not love. as for your ex bestie, ignore her and she will stop. You are playing into the drama by getting worked up, just walk away and watch her mouth drop.
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